Your Authentic Self

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We often hear the cliché, “Just be yourself.” What does it really mean to be “your authentic self” and why is it so important?

Everyone, at some point in their lifetime, looks in the mirror and does not recognise the reflection. We realise that we are strangers to ourselves and begin to soul search. The ironic part is that this journey normally starts when we experience a tragic event that turns our world upside down. During this time we need self-assurance more than ever – but hit with a double whammy – suddenly we don’t even know who we are, what we want, how to get it or what makes us happy anymore.

Life has happened to us

We become spouses that we think our partners want, parents we think our children need and employees working from one pay cheque to the next.

Do you ever wonder why young children are so happy? It’s because they don’t pretend to be anybody else and are just themselves. They say, do and feel what comes from the heart. As we grow up, our life experiences generate negative beliefs and distort our value system. At every harsh event that life throws at us, we lose part of ourselves and become pretentious.

Too often we look back at events with regret. We mull over what could have been and tell ourselves, “if only…”. We make excuses, we blame others and we justify our actions, but we never take responsibility for our actions and the consequences thereof. We fail to realise that with every event, we have a choice. To exercise our given right, to be who we really are.

 

When I underwent my transformation, I made a conscious decision to be happy, according to my standards. Happiness is a universal term and is defined differently for each one of us. I found that it’s easier to reach true bliss if you know who you are. Now I’m totally comfortable with just being myself. I also realised that the world is open to endless possibilities if you are true to yourself.

The remarkable thing about choosing happiness is that only you will know what makes you cry with joy, what makes your heart race faster, what your passion and purpose is and what makes you smile for no reason. 

 Life's a Journey

It was entirely up to me to take the first step towards this tough but rewarding journey to self-discovery. It took many trials and tribulations and lots of introspection, but I reached my destination and have never looked back. Life has never been better and the fantastic thing is – THE BEST IS YET TO COME.

“You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being who you are, your simple presence can make others happy.” - Unknown

So the next time you stand in front of the mirror, ask yourself, “Who am I? What do I want? How do I get it?” And above all, tell yourself, “I love you – just for being you.”

This is such a valuable lesson for our future generation – be yourself, no matter what. It’s a sign not only of self-love and respect, but also of confidence, dignity and integrity. So learn to love yourself unconditionally.

Believe me, it isn’t easy to live by my convictions.  Along my journey, I decided what my boundaries are, what incidents I am willing to accept, what issues I will compromise on and which of my principles are just not negotiable.

Once you reach self-realisation, you will have to face the consequences of those decisions very bravely. The amazing part is that you will realise that your challenges are not as difficult to overcome as you initially thought. You now start moving forward – EMPOWERED.

To do list:

 ·         Analyse your beliefs and values and assess if they are serving you well

 

·         Determine your rules for living and communicate these to the people you share your life with

 

·         Discover your needs and establish how to meet them

 

·         Accept responsibility for your actions and learn to face the consequences

 

·         Learn to enjoy your own company – being alone does not mean being lonely 

Live your Life

 

Don’t allow life to pass you by. Be an active participant in your own life. Take control, accept responsibility and design your own destiny to complement your authentic self. After all, you are the one who lives your life.

And once you reach your destination, keep moving forward - reflect, reinvent and set new goals. We need to keep developing ourselves – remember, whatever is not growing is dying.

 

And above all - HAVE FUN.

 

Live your authentic life!

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Mobile: 082 317 7585

 

 
www.lifecoachspecialist.co.za

 

 

 
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Mrs Deviya Sundram specialises in personal empowerment and relationship coaching. Her mission is to assist her clients in discovering their authentic self in order to fill their lives with passion and purpose. She is driven by making a difference and evoking lasting positive change.

Spending two decades in the client orientated financial industry she was drawn to the practice by her own life experiences. She is highly motivated, confident and dynamic. Her technique to coaching is based on developing the client’s self awareness thus bringing out the best in them. She provides her clients with resources to design a compelling future and to continue on the path to personal growth.

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